The Audition - Chapter One of MJI

I auditioned for moose jaw idol just over a year ago today.

Here is an email I sent to my sister the day after it happened. Brace yourself.



I auditioned for a competition here called Moose Jaw Idol. Don't tell anyone. The prize is 500 bucks and you only have to sing twice…
Here's the greasy story:
It was an absolutely dreadful day - the rain was coming down in sheets, and we could barely see the house numbers as we approached one of the shadiest homes I'd ever been to.  "This can't be it." I said.  Unfortunately, I was wrong.  
I dashed up the mini-mountain of dirt that was the side lawn, only to enter a smaller atrium-type enclosure through a tarp door.  My hesitations grew. A confident yet disheveled woman opened the door before I could knock, and told me to "hurry up and come inside" for my 'audition'.  It was in that moment I knew: I might never come out of here alive…or atleast the same.


Chantelle had to come in to sign my paper as a witness (yes, I needed a witness - it was THAT legit).  Noticing the less-than ideal smoke-infested quarters, Chantelle opted to wait for me in the car. I probably should have joined her, but the chance of winning 500 dollars (and a trip back to the home I missed so terribly) was too tempting.


I then had to stand in her kitchen/entryway (a room of all sorts, really) while she rummaged through her karaoke machine to find something suitable for me to perform. I can't stress to you how incredibly awkward I felt.  The house was probably the shadiest -animal-infested place I've ever been.  She was bragging to me about being a singing coach and smoking right in my face while doing so (how's that for an oxymoron?). Her cats and dogs were all over the place and she had 3 huge fish tanks right at the entrance on top of a beach towel. There were picture frames on the wall with no pictures in them (you could see the cardboard the frame came with). I then noticed one humongous picture of her - in a sparkly sleeveless turtleneck complete with shaded glasses on - sitting in front of a blue-sky-and-clouds background. 


Her husband sat on the computer right infront of me and didn't turn around once, even as I sang "How Do I Live"(Trisha Yearwood - the selection was somewhat limited to country) right behind him.  We were no more than 3 feet apart.  


So there I am, in a wet rain jacket, belting out this song about questioning my own survival if I have to live without love ("if you ever go...baby it would take away everything good in my life"), and he's continuing to look up random videos on YouTube.  Once again, awkward.  


So I finish the number, and she starts crying and says "You are the Competition".  She then goes on to explain to me the history of "Moose Jaw Idol" and that she has the most Karaoke Cd's of all 4 judges.  She then begins to rant about the 'Director', and said if she decided to leave that the other two judges would definitely follow her and so would all the contestants because the guy in charge is an idiot..... (at this point I once again questioned how in the world I had come to this) but that it should be a good turn-out. 


I was trying to sympathize with her but in doing so could barely breathe with the smoke-factory running directly in front of my face. To top the whole experience off, I was made to stand in front of a red velvet curtain she had draped across her kitchen door, hold up number 27, and smile through the smoke and awkwardness for a picture. I left feeling almost violated. 


The whole experience was very napolean dynamite-ish.


So there's CHAPTER ONE.

I'll tell you the actual competition story soon....yikes.

Allergies VS Me

Today they're winning.

We're Normal

This was my greeting as I approached the house on Saturday afternoon.  Typical.

Please Shave. Please.

Here are some portraits I stumbled upon from the "World Beard and Mustache Championship" (side note: I really would like to do something less bizarre for my next free lunch hour).  Need I say more?  Perhaps.  Out of respect for the artistry displayed in the following photographs, I shall keep my commentary to one-word (albeit dripping with sarcasm) sentiments for each of them.

slick.                                                                  practical.

timeless.                                                                      classy.

Say what you will, but deep down I know you're glad I posted these.

Got Calories?

In case you were looking for a way to gain weight fast while simultaneously wreaking havoc on your organs,
here are some options (that I found posted here) for you to choose from and use in reaching your goal:

"Got beef? This sandwich sure does. Burger King's "BK Quad Stacker" hamburger has four beef patties, topped with bacon, cheese, sauce, lettuce, pickles and onions. It weighs in with 1010 calories, 70 grams of fat, 30 mg of saturated fat, 3 grams trans fats, 210 mg cholesterol, 34 carbs, 6 grams sugar, 64 grams protein and 1800 mg sodium -- not counting the French Fries."

"What's better than a juicy hamburger? How about a hamburger stuffed between two grilled cheese sandwiches? Friendly's boasts that its new Grilled Cheese BurgerMelt features a "thick and juicy 100% Black Angus Big Beef Burger between two whole grilled cheese sandwiches, complete with lettuce, tomato and mayo." The sandwich also comes complete with 1,500 calories, 97 grams of fat and 2,090 milligrams of sodium."

And then this happened:

"KFC's new Double Down sandwich, which hits stores nationwide today, has been buzzed about since its ingredients were revealed. The Double Down is essentially a sandwich with two chicken fillets taking the place of bread slices. In between are two pieces of bacon, melted slices of Monterey Jack and Pepper Jack cheese and a zesty sauce. The sandwich will pack 540 calories, 32 grams of fat and 1,380 milligrams of sodium, according to KFC."

Well, I don't know what else to say except it's Friday (Hallelujah) and I'm thankful to be alive and smart enough to avoid eating food like this...

All in the Family

A Few pictures from our Father's Day Dinner at Grandma's....

Tori and Lise

Ya-Lin and I

The Saip Clan - Elise is less than impressed...

There we go!

and one with the out-laws :)

We love you Dad!

Right On, Broseph.

I think it’s easy to be lazy when it comes to hallmark holidays.  Cards written with every possible expression of love and admiration for the mom, dad and spouse we adore, pre-packaged gifts with an assortment of appropriate generosity (send Dad golfing!  Treat mom to a Spa Day!  Say it with chocolate!) and a ridiculous amount of targeted television broadcasting (Seriously, could there be more baseball, golf and football on this weekend? No.).   I say this with the acknowledgement of my own transgressions in this matter – I, possibly more than almost everyone, fall prey to the commercialism of aforementioned holidays.  I do, however, celebrate these days with a genuine and authentic appreciation for the impossibly amazing people that are represented to me as mothers, fathers, and (very important to note the singular tense of the next word) spouse (see? I’m a one husband wife). I only wish there were Sister's Day and Brother's Day.

This being said, I was outdone this Father's Day. Big time… and I’m more than okay with it. The person responsible?

 This Guy. Don't be deceived by his boyish charm...he's basically all that is man.

My brother is pretty fantastic.  I’ve talked about him before – though not in detail (mostly because he is not the mushy-type – guaranteed he’ll be uncomfortable even with my restrained sentiment here).  He’s my baby brother (despite towering over me and turning 19 next month) and yet, for the first time this weekend, I realized just how much I respect him and look up to him – as a man.  He is not one to dive into the hallmark holidays.  Let’s face it, he’s a typical guy when it comes to remembering the day of, scrambling to sign a card and buy a thoughtful-despite-being-last-minute gift.  Where he’s different though, is in the heart.

He is a lover and keeper of all things traditional.  He places great value and importance on maintaining our heritage, our history, and our furniture (I had to mention the last one because we’re always arguing back and forth about painting wooden furniture pieces – I’m of the opinion that if it’s ugly, paint it – don’t keep it as plain wood just for the sake of it…my brother disagrees.  Perhaps it’s because he actually knows what he’s talking about…?Maybe.)  To ensure that we don’t forget or lose our identity as Saip’s, Rockwell’s, , Snider’s or Grandy’s , he makes a point of listening and learning about where we came from.  He speaks highly of our family – and remembers absolutely everything (this is not meant to be a joke – he actually remembers EVERYTHING – he finds embarrassing moments belonging to his sisters especially note-worthy…).   Gatlin even inherited both sides of our family genes/talents.  He is ridiculously musical and all things SAIP simultaneously.  He’s athletic and artistic – with my mom’s freckles and musical genius, my dad’s eyes and poltical conscience, my gram-bea’s maritime antics, my grampy's love for automobiles and my Papa’s work ethic.  To put it plainly: I'm very proud of him. 

Proof that he's a ringer for our Dad the Dale-Snail (circa 1977 ...?)

 Here he is at one of his very favourite locations on earth: My Uncle's Farm in Macoun

 (ignore the goofy expression)

 To give you an example of this type of family-tradition-type love, I’ll explain to you what happened this past Saturday.

My Brother, my Dad, my uncle Grant and my cousin Linden all went fishing.  It wasn’t an ordinary fishing trip.  There was a definite purpose in it, a deliberate location, and a prized possession accompanying them. To understand the significance, I'll give you a little history first...

Weaver Lake, as we’ve all known it for life, was a favourite best-kept-secret fishing spot of my Papa’s. He absolutely loved to fish – though he hated anything to do with eating them.  

My Papa showing off his catch

He took my dad and his brothers with him fishing often, and in later years, the trips got bigger and often he would go with his group of buddies up a little farther north – but he always returned to Weaver Lake.  He even took us grandkids there on several occasions – and it’s still one of my very favourite memories that I have of my grandfather - Doing what he loved, and sharing it with us  - I tend to think that the memories and emotional attachment to Weaver Lake far out weigh the actual fishing. 

Papa and his sons at Weaver Lake

So they went to Weaver Lake for a Father's Day Fishing Trip.  My brother arranged and purchased a small fishing boat (coined 'Mother Moose'-  our beloved Grandma's nickname), which he successfully tested in my parent's pool and combined with a motor (and make-shift handle). They took along a trophy that was given to my dad not that long ago – my Papa and his friends had started an annual Lake Champion Fishing Trip - in which the fisherman with the largest catch that day would win the trophy, have their name engraved and own bragging rights until the next time around.

Papa with the Laker Champion Trophy

 Though my Papa died in 2001, his friends continued their annual trips, and named the trophy after him.  As of this year, they decided to pass along the tradition to my Dad and his brothers - and they, with their sons, were happy to rise to the occasion.

Here are some pictures from their day at Weaver Lake:

Uncle Grant and Iggy

Dad enjoying a cigar in his belly boat

 A Prized Possession

 Watters with his catch

Iggy with the winner!

My Dad, an expert Fisherman :)

The 3rd generation Fishermen

Sons and Grandsons of Len

Gatlin is one of my very favourite people - not only because he's my baby brother, but because he has turned into one heck of a guy...and I know my Papa would agree.

Now how's that for legitimate-sentiment on a Hallmark Holiday? 

Modern Family Love

Just to brighten your Thursday:

Bangle Bangle Jingle Jangle

I have blogged about my Auntie Terri before. You've all been informed previously that she's awesome - simply because she's my auntie that I love dearly (read about her HERE). In addition to being absolutely fabulous, she enjoys unnecessarily lavishing love and gifties on her nieces and nephews.

Here is the evidence:

She gave me these ALEXIS BITTAR bangles (that I love far too much) as a 'thank-you' for updating  her blog. See? spoiled rotten for absolutely no good reason - and I certainly don't mind!

Thanks Auntie.  You're the BEST!

The Other Halves

Friday night marked the beginning of a smid-filled weekend. We ventured out to Maguro Sushi - for the food, not the service - and spent the evening convincing Michelle that sushi and seafood and sunomono salad really is glorious - she had just been misled (or perhaps deceived) by previously experiencing otherwise. Now, Michelle is no fool when it comes to cooking and delicious cuisine - that I will admit. HOWEVER, by living in denial of all things seafood, she is, in my opinion, missing out on one of the greatest blessings known to the human tastebud(s). Despite this misjudgement - she is a great friend. She indulged her seafood loving husband and friends in several ways:
1)She chose from the limited non-fishy menu without complaining (chicken teryaki.was the obvious choice).
2)She refrained from making gagging noises or gestures while the 3 of us binged on sashimi and ebi sunomono.
3)She agreed to return to said Sushi joint should we ever propose the idea again.
Here is the evidence:

what developed chopstick-holding ability.

sheer distain on his face for the 

person taking the picture.

please note the sexy tattoo cleavage.

Saturday began with a birthday party for the coolest 3-year-old in town.  Noah had a Thomas the Tank Engine party at the beach (yes, trains LOVE the beach) and despite it being at 10am (yes, we enjoy sleeping in on our days off. yes, we don't have children.  yes, that might be one of the reasons.) we had a fantastic time with the Kroekers, Olferts and Smids (our other not-ready-for-kids-yet partners in crime).

Saturday evening consisted of the first summer season BBQ - complete with homemade mojitos that basically propelled me into full-on warm weather mode.Sunday morning we heard from Jon and Suzi Livingstone about their work with the Dalit Freedom Network.  They have the amazing priviledge of working full-time with an organization that embodies truth.  Read about their work here.

Sunday afternoon came with more gorgeous weather, perfect for a patio lunch with friends, a walk around the market, and a FRIENDS marathon with the beautiful Natalia. This was a highlight:

Aaaaand…..then it was Monday.

We'll Be Baaaack

We're in the process of moving back into our beloved loft apartment. Remember this place?

ignore the dishes. i beg you.

note the roses and chocolate trail from my thoughtful husband that Easter...

 Next week we'll begin putting our bc furniture in the place, and the week after we'll have our saskatchewan furniture back and moved in as well.

YAY!

with regret...

We need to sell this. It's gorgeous, but too big for our limited amount of space :)
If you know anyone...hound them!
http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/rds/fuo/1791423079.html

feeling the fear, she did it anyway

Alright.

Remember a few weeks back when I promised new and exciting plans (of which I could not speak of at the time)? Well, here’s the scoop:

I’m starting up 2 new business endeavours….and 1 scholastic adventure.


                 ‘SHINE Performing Arts’ (musical theatre camps for children)

Based on the brilliant brain-child of my sister Jalen, we will be co-instructing children in singing and acting this August.  We have already begun taking registrations and are extremely excited to be back working with kids and doing what it is we love most.  Check out our website – and tell your child-raising friends….

www.shineperformingarts.com

 W. Hair Design

Yes yes yes.  I missed it….a lot. I will be back doing Hair Design in the same little shop area.  I will be launching officially late this summer, but will be taking appointments beginning in July.  I will launch a website soon with my hair design services and prices.  Stay tuned J

               

      School

Back to it.  I’m going to be back finishing my undergrad – in what you ask? Well that’s a good question.  I will be finishing my bachelor of arts but with a focus in communications/english….atleast that’s the plan for now J

So with all this comes an end to my time at PTC.  I will be finished here officially at the end of July – right after our President’s Preview event in Whistler finishes.  It feels so good to be starting something new.

And now, some favourites of mine from Sarah Khallad (She began her own business in Calgary at university - making magnets and cards with pictures she'd taken and phrases she felt depicted the nature of fabulous women. I love her stuff. Check out her website!) :

Today's Theme

“Her path unclear, the possibilities endless, she took a step in the direction of her future self.” -Sarah Khallad

I Heart The Eagles

I went to the Eagles Concert Tuesday night.  The epitome of musical-ecstasy, to say the least.  My brother has long since known what I didn't always appreciate until more recently: these guys are absolutely incredible, from their better-than-ever vocals to their silly on-stage antics – they are absolute Legends (that word is for you, Simbo). 

Favourite Moments:

 -Joe Walsh singing Life’s Been Good (while literally jumping on one foot and soloing on the electric guitar)

-Glenn Frey calling their ‘Long Road Out of Eden Tour’ the “Eagles’ Assisted-Living Tour”.

-Timothy B. Schmidt singing “I Can’t Tell You Why”

-Don Henley singing “The Long Run” to Joe Walsh (and promptly having his advances shut down).

- The harmonies backing up Glenn Frey on “Take it to the Limit” – ethereal.

- Favourite Song of the evening:  “In the City”

Here is them performing that song (quite a few years ago now – but you get the idea):

And now, a little Eagles-through-the-years for you to enjoy: